Mars in aries (personal)

They are given to impulsive action, and they are not known for sticking things through. Although their physical energy is great, they can lose their initial enthusiasm quickly. Mars in Aries natives are easily irritated by indirectness from others.

I haven't really looked over my natal chart until today but one that really stuck out is the fire sign i have. For the longest i begged for a fire to spark inside of me and i had it at the most important place to have it. Lately i have been real focused on trying to have a social life again and juggle a career, a job and the risk of self destruction. I got some good advice from a my mentor of arts.

" its always best to have a solid foundation"

I know that  it dont sound so ground breaking but hear me out. I've only taught myself how to get up and when i build something normally it would have terrible foundation due to my indecisive nature.

 "Should i do writing or poetry ? What about photography and video? And what about the music? Should i produce or just rap? Should i go to a different genre??"

All these questions and more buzzed around my head which would cause me to knock the structure that was poorly built and start again. To me thats part im familiar with. Getting back up .....idont know.... i think i saw it as a badge of honor i can keep getting back up. As if it was showing my resilience but looking that not resilient.....thats stupidity. Its like having a shield and just standing on the battlefield holding up the shield. Yea its a great asset but if you dont move forword with it, its useless. So now with a mindstate to make foundation me being motivated actually come easy. I just needed a goal.... Which brings me to the original reason i wrote this ...... I dont have anything like nothing. I know its best to be grateful n i am. I have a job ,i have my cell phone bill paid , i always got a way to travel. But i .....want ....MORE!
Its not even in a greedy type of way its more of a i see others who have simple things and i feel likw im at a stage in my life where its perfectly acceptable for me to have or aspire to have these things. One of my goals was to leave a mark n if i cant do simple things like live how can i leave a mark ????? I want my own place, i want my own car, i want to get my own camera , my own mic , they will come tho and thats what im learning as long as i continue on my path. I will get it . ive made claims like this before but like i said, that foundation line really struck a nerve with me. So simple but so significant.  I'm gonna get it slowly but surely

Equalvalnt exchange

Work +time= steps ahead