Passion

 must i scream to get my point across 

must i dream to get over my loss


I dont think others understand how much passion i have. At times its overwhelming. As a cup that runneth over, its over the top of how much i love this craft. This art. I want to do it all the time. Today i woke up , and wanted to write that was the only thing in my head

"Write.Write.WRITE!"

Like a positive anexiety. I have never felt like this before well...i did about music at one point but music is a little different. You need equripment , money , beats , an engineer multiple things to get music to come alive. Writing is alive as soon as you put pen to paper or type a letter to a screen. That's a big difference. To make something in your head come alive. Everything is done by me. The editing the multiple drafts all me.Its something in this world that is all mine. And whats best about it is, im good at it. I mean i feel like i can always get better i have things to work on and im doing it because i love the craft. But im definatinely above the average person who may not write at all. These words are like bricks that build a beautiful house that i can stand back and look at and say"Look what I did! Look what I  can do." For many years, i was pleagued by the feeling that of insignificance. I felt nothing i did matttered and never will. I'll just be one of those guys whos know a lot but do nothing it. I have a voccation now. I  HAVE A VOCATTION. A craft.

The problem is no one have the same passion as me.So im not around other writier to share this feeling. The closest i gave is my brother who have a passion for music which i do too byut its not as deepas my passion for writing. (songwriting is a part of music but its not the same) but i love people who are passionate about things. Its beautiful to see some  face light up now heres the sad part.

And at this part of my life i cant worry about that anymore because it childish to wait around for people to care because its one truth in life

Noone cares

Not to sound nilestic but its kinda true. People wont care unless you do. Sadly, you have to put in their face" hey this is what i like!!! Look at this because i put work and effort into this!" Its like a child with a drawing in class. It boost self esteem. When you grow older you start to realize that not that many people are going to boost your self esteem. That's why people walk around with inflated egos or  the more popular self deprivations. 

Laptop acting stupid and it's pissing me so I guess I'm done